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Open Letter For Soon-To-Be Dads For Father’s Day – Don’t Listen To Anyone’s Advice!

John Laura
Photo: John Riggs
The other day a friend of mine casually asked me if I had any advice for him, a soon-to-be dad. My answer, simply said, “don’t listen to anyone else’s advice.” Here’s why.

I’ve never written a book, I’m no specialist and I’m certainly not the most knowledgeable on the subject, but I do know this. Other people don’t live with you, they’re not going to be the ones waking up in the middle of the night to feed them, they’re not paying for all of the doctor’s bills that come in at the most inconvenient of times. Why should you allow their advice or input on anything, from choosing the baby’s name to (my most annoying request) making sure the baby is born on a specific date.

Now, if you want my opinion or advice, please ask and I’ll help you out as best as I can with scenarios that have worked for me. When Justin Furstenfeld (lead singer for Blue October) and I were talking about our newborn babies, he was mentioning that, now that the baby is supplementing with formula they spit up more often. I mentioned the same thing happened to my baby until I got a special kind of formula which made the spitting up less frequent. I haven’t heard otherwise so I think it worked.

One piece of advice I did get from a friend before my first child was born wasn’t really advice, but more a philosophy. She said, “your baby will be part of your life, but don’t make it become your life. Still do what you love to do and have your own life that includes your family.” I took that with me to this day.

So, my advice if you’re about to me a father or mother for the first time, don’t listen to anyone’s advice. All of the books are mostly crap. All of those baby products like bottle warmers and baby wipe warmers are also crap – don’t waste your money. If you need advice on what to eat, when to do things or are just frustrated because you can’t figure out why your newborn is crying after being changed, fed and cleaned – ask your mom. You’re alive today so your mom must have done something right.

I’ve been a dad for 7 years now and have 3 kids. If you ever feel like it, you can certainly email me about whatever and I can help as needed.

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