Since 2020 hit I have been attempting to cut back on the caffeine. I've read it's good if you're trying to have a baby so I've been working on switching to more green tea/matcha and so far it's been pretty awesome. I've also been working hard on drinking homemade tea but last week I rolled through the Human Bean and decided to try their hot matcha drink. ****

I can't stop thinking about it like I cannot STOP thinking about it.

I was able to hold off for a week but today it wouldn't stop. The craving was too real. But there were a few nerves involved. One I wanted to save cash because I have none, so I not so patiently waited for Happy Hour, only $2 woohoo.

Rolling through the drive-through at 3:45 pm I realized that I was EARLY, Happy Hour didn't begin until 5 pm. I sped back to the studio, because yes I was on-air at the time. It's right down the road but that is how bad the craving was.

I waited until the show was over and sped back with 10 minutes to spare to order my drink. She tried to make me a cold one, honey, it's FREEZING outside. Fix that ish ;)

The sun had set and there was still work left to finish. This day and lack of motivation aren't helping. This isn't going how I had planned.

This morning I packed my gym bag because I was going to hit the pool but now I have decided that is a big phat no, I am not going to the pool. Why? One I don't want to and Two I don't want to. But I do. But I don't. Uh, the struggle is real. I know if I just push I will love it but I'm not there yet.

The matcha drink ended up being only 75 calories, not 250 calories like a caramel macchiato. So that can be my main reason to not go, today.

I just don't have the energy.

Every day we come across decisions, we can either try to cram everything in, leaving us feeling drained or we can take a step back and decide what we can and cannot handle.

This is one of those days. I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed in at 192 and I was bummed. I have been bummed about it all day but you know what? It's not the end of the world. This isn't the heaviest I have been, I am strong and healthy and can fix this. There is nothing to be sad or frustrated about but at the same time, sometimes it is what it is.

I write this tale weekly to show you that you are not alone. We all struggle and even though 99% of the time you will see me smiling and laughing it all off, I have those days too.

Pick your battles and work on being kind to yourself. Tomorrow is a new day and another opportunity to crush a goal.

I know I am already winning this week because I splurged on a 15-pound kettlebell and last night did my first work-out in the comfort of my own home.

You don't need a gym to get you in shape but you do need motivation so if you are lacking the support you can always join Get It Right! Get It Tight! for free. Or join the gym and grab yourself a training session to teach you the ropes for where you want to go, or start walking with a friend, there's a fun running group I joined on Facebook. I haven't run with them yet but I like to think at some point I will.

Tomorrow (Wednesday, January 15th, 2020) is the last day to sign-up for the Insane Inflatable 5K with your $10 discount. Use this code 2020 and only pay $19 or snooze and pay full price.

It's important to have something to look forward to and knowing I have a 5K coming up does help motivate me into moving. Not today, but soon :)